#poetry — Nasty Party Girls by Lauren Short

I wrote this poem for my poetry class. And of course, I read it out loud to everyone. Please enjoy.

Toot it and boot it as they say.
Vote is down,
To get those ugly girls away.
Girl you better not plan to stay,
You be looking like a dumb clown.
Weave be broke, plus you crazy.
Do not be giving me no frown,
You be hazy.
Get out of town.

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Suckerberg refuses to have additional breast implant surgery; Facebook staff grows increasingly concerned over Founder’s well-being.

During an interview conducted with Mashable’s Ben Parr, Suckerberg stated that he will not undergo a second breast augmentation and plans to remain as the man-thing with one boob.

“Lately people have been calling me cyclops, I kind of like how that sounds. It’s definitely a better name than Mark.” Suckerberg continued to explain how plans to change his name once again to “better fit” the person he is today. “I really like the name Uno Tit Suckerberg; it sounds Spanish and exotic!”

Suckerberg had changed his mind about having the additional surgery after watching clips of himself on Saturday Night Live. “I noticed that having one large lump on my chest looked really good on camera. Besides, I lost my other nipple tassel. If I can’t wear them both, then I refuse to have two breasts.”

I had called the Facebook headquarters and spoke to Vice President of Global Communications, Marketing and Public Policy Elliot Schrage. “This guy [Suckerberg] just gets stranger and stranger everyday. One day he’s here dressed in his normal North Face getup, the next he’s prancing around in assless chaps and high heels screaming at everyone to ‘tuck it.’ Not only do I have absolutely no idea what this man is talking about, but I am truly concerned for his well-being.”

Schrage further explained how he observed Suckerberg yelling at inanimate objects in the staff cafeteria. “He was accusing a chair of raping his mind at the exact same time an elementary school tour walked by. All of those poor children were subjected to his insane ramblings. This is destroying the company reputation!”

What does the future hold for Facebook? Only time will tell.

And yes, this is entirely made up.

#nowplaying — Lil Wayne – Drop The World ft. Eminem

It hurts but I never show,
this pain you’ll never know.
If only you can see just how lonely and how cold
and frostbit I’ve become.
My back’s against the wall.
When push come to shove
I just stand up and scream f-ck em all.
Man it feels like these walls are closing in, this roof is caving in.
Oop, it’s time to raise it then.

After all, you are just another brick in the wall.

Today I challenge my poetry teacher. She asked us to write down one question for her pertaining to the class. The day before she had issued a quiz over a poem we had not gone over together as a class. Every other day we have done this, and every single time multiple people draw different responses. On the quiz it was apparent that I got every single question wrong simply it was not the response SHE wanted. With that in mind, I asked her the following question:

If I read the poem and gathered a different interpretation than you, am I wrong?

If something is based off of emotion and relevance to life, how can you grade it? All of us are different. There is no answer key to life, teacher.